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15 Tips for Missionary Wives

15 Tips for Missionary Wives

The Missionary’s Wife on Deputation—Part 2

Profile picture for user Dr. Rick Martin
By Dr. Rick Martin, Tuesday, February 1, 2011

This is part two of this article. Click here for part one.

While traveling on deputation, my wife and I learned much about what works and what doesn’t. Below are fifteen tips for missionary wives that helped our time on deputation:

1. She Should Look Her Best

This includes making sure her family’s clothes are clean and pressed. (Traveling has a way of wrinkling clothes, so make sure you bring an iron with you.)

  • She should try to keep her hair nice at all times and always have her shoes polished.
  • She should dress properly—even during leisure time. Don’t be sloppy.
  • She should not go overboard on makeup and hairstyles.

2. She Should Not Express Opinions about Little Things That Might Offend Others

3. She Should Show Interest in the Pastor’s Wife

Missionary wives will often find that pastors’ wives are hungry for fellowship. The missionary wife should have a sympathetic ear and keep everything strictly confidential. She should be more concerned about the pastor’s wife than her own problems.

4. She Should Serve the Lord Every Time She Gets an Opportunity

Missionary wives should be glad to go soulwinning, go bus calling, teach Sunday school, speak to ladies, etc. When someone asks her for help-, she should say “I’d love to,” not “I’ll think it over.” She should volunteer to work if she isn’t asked to do anything.

5. She Should Develop a Good Sense of Humor

This will help her overcome her problems and not get discouraged by them. Missionaries have a lot more fun on deputation if they learn to laugh.

6. She Should Volunteer to Help

When people allow you to stay in their home, you should volunteer to wash dishes, do laundry, watch the kids, cook, etc. My wife often volunteered to babysit so the pastor and his wife could go out together. They greatly appreciated that.

7. She Should Write Thank You Notes

The missionary wife should express her gratitude to pastors’ wives as well as to people who house or feed you.

8. She Should Have a Good Attitude

She should have a spirit that says, “I’m here to learn from you; I’m here to serve you; what can I do for you?” Not, “What can you do for me?”

9. She Should Never Be Critical

10. She Should Be Positive

The missionary wife will have many times when she is discouraged. She must not allow that to show to the people she is trying to encourage.

11. She Should Spend Time with the Lord Everyday

12. She Should Keep a Sweet Relationship with Her Husband

Telling him he does a good job goes a long way towards keeping him encouraged.

13. She Should Be Disciplined with Her Time

14. She Should Make Sure Her Children Are Well Behaved

I realize how hard deputation can be, both for you and your children. We certainly want our children to be disciplined. More importantly, we want our children to grow up to be what God wants for their lives.

There needs to be a balance. We should want our children to have fun when we travel, but we must teach them how to behave.

15. She Should Work at Becoming a Better Soulwinner

Never become satisfied. There will be many opportunities to go soulwinning on deputation and the missionary wife should take advantage of them to learn all she can. Not only will it get people to Heaven, but it will help her on the field.

Some time ago, our friend, Pastor David Stertzbach, came to visit us in the Philippines. He reminded me of the time Becky and I went to his church on deputation. Becky went soulwinning with some ladies in his church, and led an older lady to Christ. This lady came to church, was baptized, and became a faithful member. On her deathbed she asked Brother Stertzbach to please call “that missionary lady” who stopped by her house and told her about the Lord. Is there anything that could be a greater blessing than that?

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Article by

Dr. Rick Martin

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West Coast Baptist College

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