Someone once said, “It is more rewarding to resolve a conflict than to dissolve a relationship.” The pursuit of resolution in marital conflict says to your spouse, “I love you so much that I will stay here until this problem is taken care of!” Rather than the silent treatment or some other manipulative behavior, mature marriages work things out. A mature couple will talk, pray, and refuse to let something go unresolved.

Conflict in marriage is inevitable. You will never eradicate it completely from your home, but you can deal with it biblically and with spiritual maturity. Here are ten “wrong ways” to handle marital conflict:

1. Denying that a problem even exists

2. The silent treatment (relational withdrawal)

3. Emotional outbursts (adult temper tantrums)

4. Walking away and refusing to work it out

5. Verbal sparring with hurtful words (trying to win an argument rather than resolve the problem)

6. Bringing up past failures (viewing today’s conflict through yesterday’s pain)

7. Shifting the blame and not admitting my own failure

8. Ignoring the problem and pretending it will go away

9. Failing to seek the Holy Spirit’s guidance through prayer

10. Refusing to say, “I was wrong; I am sorry; will you forgive me?”