“A man who knows that he is saved by believing in Christ does not, when he is baptized, lift his baptism into a saving ordinance. In fact, he is the very best protester against that mistake, because he holds that he has no right to be baptized until he is saved.”—Charles Spurgeon
Although Jane was raised a Methodist, she started attending a Baptist church when she moved to a new community. One day she was helping a group of women clean the church kitchen. She emptied the large electric coffeepot and handed it to the lady washing dishes.
The lady washing dishes asked, “Can this be washed like everything else?”
“No,” Jane replied. “This is a Methodist coffeepot. It says right here, DO NOT IMMERSE.”
A father was talking to his oldest son about the boy’s upcoming baptism. Wanting him to understand the significance of the event, he took great care to communicate with him. While they were talking, the boy’s younger brother, a little four-year-old, left the room. He seemed visibly upset so teh father followed him to see what was wrong. Tearfully, the little guy confessed, “I want to be alphabetized with my brother.”
There were four country churches in a small Texas town: The Presbyterian church, the Baptist church, the Methodist church, and the Catholic church. Each church was overrun with pesky squirrels.
One day,the Presbyterian church called a meeting to decide what to do about the squirrels.
After much prayer and consideration they determined that the squirrels were predestined to be there and they shouldn't interfere with God's divine will.