Coffee was always served at our church after the sermon. One Sunday the
pastor asked a child if he knew why we had coffee hour. Without
hesitating, the youngster replied, “To wake people up before they have
to drive home.”
While Roxie Wallace’s preschool grandson was visiting, he got testy and
started crying about the least little things that didn’t go his
way. One such incident involved animal crackers. He wanted some more,
but she refused to give in so he burst into tears. In exasperation
Roxie said, “Sam, I don’t know what I’m going to do with you. You cry
over nothing.” He calmed down, looked at her and replied, “You need to
tell me, ‘Stop whining.’”
While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, the
police officer was interrupted by a little girl. She asked if he was a
policeman, and he nodded while continuing with his report. She then
explained how her mother told her that if she ever needed help she
should ask a policeman. She asked, “Is that right?” The officer
replied, “Yes, that's right.” The kindergartener then pointed at her
shoe and tenderly asked, “Would you please tie my shoe?”
The two most intellectually astute years for children are age four and age seventeen. At four they know all of the questions, and at seventeen they know all of
the answers.
Harriet Frye watched as her four-year-old granddaughter handed a small
Easter basket of candy eggs to her grandfather. Crystal then climbed up
into her grandpa’s lap, looked into his eyes, and very seriously said,
“Friends share.”
Source: The Best of Grandparents' Brag Board, Pregel and Riley
A Sunday school teacher asked each member of her class to write one sentence on “What Easter Means to Me.” One pupil wrote: “Egg salad sandwiches for
the next two weeks!”
McKenzie wasn’t trying to start a theological debate, she just wanted to make a point about Jesus’ resurrection. Her Sunday school teacher had tried to encourage her class with the assurance that Jesus is everywhere. But for McKenzie, that didn’t sound right. So she said, “I know one place where Jesus isn’t.” The teacher curiously replied, “Oh, really? Where is that?”
“If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale, and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into heaven?” I asked the children in my Sunday school class. “NO!” the children all answered.
“If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would that get me into heaven?” Again the answer was, “NO!”
“Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave candy to all the children and loved my wife, would that get me into heaven?” I asked them again. Once more they all answered,“NO!”
When the Klingler’s were going on an extended vacation, they asked their nine-year-old neighbor, Mike, about taking care of the family dog. They explained that the job would require feeding, watering, grooming, walking, and spending plenty of time playing with the dog while giving her lots of love. After covering the job description, they asked what the job would be worth to him. The little boy replied, “I’ll give you ten bucks.”
A young father wanted to read a magazine but he was being bothered by his little daughter, Vanessa. Finally, he tore a page out of his magazine on which was printed a map of the world. Tearing it into small pieces, he gave it to Vanessa, and said, “Go into the other room and put this back together for me.” After a few minutes, Vanessa returned and handed him the map correctly fitted together. The father was astonished and asked how she had finished so quickly. “Oh,” she said, “On the other side of the paper is a picture of Jesus.
A missionary in Jamaica was once questioning some little boys on the meaning of Matthew 5:5 and asked, "Who are the meek?" A boy answered, "Those who give soft answers to rough questions." We shall do well to remember this child's definition.
