Illustrations

Jeff Bezos, the CEO of Amazon.com, was ten years old when he saw a commercial stating that every puff a smoker took on a cigarette shortened his or her life by two minutes. He was quite a math whiz, so he began adding up how many minutes a long-time smoker like his grandmother had lost to cigarettes. To his surprise, Jeff’s grandmother began to cry when he announced that she had lost sixteen years of her life to smoking. His grandfather took him aside for a talking to. To Jeff’s surprise, his grandfather was not angry, nor did he attempt to punish him.

Sixty-eight-year-old Elsie Holdren lost her position as a security guard in August 2010 because she was too courteous. Her superiors wrote, “Due to your caring and giving nature, you are compromising your position as a security officer. Being caring and giving is not a job requirement, nor is it what you are paid to do.” Elsie was transferred to a new position in nearby Melbourne. Most people would not be fired because they are too nice, but because they are not nice enough.

Source: Unknown

Mamie Adams always went to the same post office in her town because the postal employees there were friendly. She went there to buy stamps just before Christmas one year and the lines were particularly long. Someone pointed out that there was no need to wait in line because there was a stamp machine in the lobby. “I know,” said Mamie, ‘but the machine won’t ask me about my arthritis.”

Source: Bits and Pieces, December, 1989

The brilliant Scottish writer, Thomas Carlyle, lived on a farm in Dumfriesshire, which he called “the loneliest nook in Britain.” Each day he climbed a ladder to his attic, where he worked until dark. His devoted wife Jane was left alone. One evening at dinner, Jane asked why he had never expressed appreciation for the food she lovingly prepared for him. “Woman,” Carlyle barked, “must you be paid for everything you do?” With that, he stamped off to his attic workshop. Years later, when his wife died, Carlyle found her diary.

Mrs. Mohler was being cross-examined about the death of her third husband. The attorney asked, “What happened to your first husband?”

Mrs. Mohler replied, “He died of mushroom poisoning.” The attorney then inquired about her second husband. She said that he too died from mushroom poisoning. The attorney then asked, “And what about your third husband?”

Mrs. Mohler replied, “He died of a brain concussion.”

“And how did that happen?”

Mrs. Mohler confessed, “I hit him with an iron skillet because he wouldn’t eat the mushrooms.”

A married couple was celebrating their 60th wedding anniversary.

At the party everybody wanted to know how they managed to stay married so long in this day and age.

The husband responded, “When we were first married, we came to an agreement. I would make all the major decisions, and my wife would make all the minor decisions.”

At which point the wife took up the tale, “And in 60 years of marriage, we have never needed to make a major decision.”

Source: Unknown

To celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary, the couple returned to their honey moon hotel. After retiring the wife said, “Darling, do you remember how you stroked my hair?” and so he stroked her hair. She reminded him of the way they cuddled and so they did. With a sigh she said, “Won’t you nibble my ear again?”

With that the husband got out of bed and left the room.

“Where are you going?” cried the upset wife.

“To get my teeth!”

Source: Unknown

Warren Buffet is one of the greatest investors in our day. In June 2005, someone bought a lunch with him for $351,100. If there was an entrance fee to Heaven no one would get there.

Source: Bloomberg Businessweek, June 8, 2006

“Do not think that any work God gives you to do in the world is on too small a scale for you to do it.”—T. DeWitt Talmage

“I have seen, at different times, the smoke of a thousand villages—villages whose people are without Christ, without God, and without hope in the world.”—Robert Moffat

“I have but one passion—it is He, it is He alone. The world is the field and the field is the world; and henceforth that country shall be my home where I can be most used in winning souls for Christ.”—Count Zinzindorf

Ariana came with her missionary parents to visit family in the United States. During their stateside assignment away from Brazil, someone asked Ariana if she wanted to be a missionary when she grew up. The 5-year-old stated, “I’m a missionary now. I want to be something else when I grow up!”

Source: Mature Living