Newspaper
columnist George Crane told the story of a wife who came into his office wanting to divorce her husband. She said, “I do not only want to get rid of him, I
want to get even. Before I divorce him, I want to hurt him as much as he has
me.”
Surprised to see an empty seat at the super bowl
stadium, a diehard fan remarked about it to a man sitting
nearby. “It was my wife’s,” the man explained, “But she died.” “Oh!
I’m very sorry to hear that,” said the man. “Yet I’m really surprised
that another relative, or friend, didn’t jump at the chance to take the
seat reserved for her.” “Beats me,”
he said. “They all insisted on going to the funeral.”
The story is told about an old farm couple who were driving along in their
pickup when the wife said, “We never sit all snuggled up in the truck like we
used to.” The husband looked at her and said, “I haven't moved.”
When
we discover as a church or as individual believers that we aren't as
close to God as we once were, understand this, He didn’t move, we did.
It was 1898 and Ben had left the East 8 years ago to head out West in
hopes of making his fortune. Well he wasn't rich, but he had accumulated
over 300 acres of good land and built a comfortable farm house on it. He
raised wheat, corn, and all of his vegetables. He had managed to build
his herd of cattle to over 200 head. Having accomplished all of this in
only 8 years, he decided that it was now time.
The ad that he placed in the New York newspaper said, “Wanted: A good woman willing to be a pen pal. Marriage is a
possibility for the right woman.”
Adam’s wife was quite a talker and seldom stayed on the phone for less
than an hour. One day he was surprised when he heard her hang up after
just twenty-five minutes so he went into see if there was problem. When he
expressed concern, Irene cheerfully explained, “Oh, no, everything is
fine. I just dialed the wrong number.”
Debbie's family means everything to her. Her son and cute little
daughter play sports, take music lessons, and attend a private
school. Debbie spends every waking moment of every day caring for her
kids. Often she goes through an entire day without having time for her husband which makes him fell neglected. If he feels neglected how does God feel? She lives through
her children; they are like false gods in her life.
While attending a marriage seminar on communication, Tom and his wife,
Grace, listened to the instructor: “It is essential that husbands and
wives know each other’s likes and dislikes.” He addressed the men: “Can
you name your wife’s favorite flower?” Tom leaned over, touched Grace’s
arm gently, and whispered, “It’s Pillsbury, isn’t it?”
“Cash, check, or charge?” asked the salesclerk as the lady made her
purchases. When she fumbled for her wallet, the clerk noticed a TV
remote control in her purse. “So, do you always carry your TV remote
around with you?” he asked. “No,” she replied, “but my husband refused
to come shopping with me, and I figured this was the most evil thing I
could legally do to him.”
